The title of this post is a quote from my father. He has a standard catalog of quotes that he’s issued as refrains many times on my way up through. This is one that he tends to invoke when we are discussing a big meeting or a big transition that is upcoming.
I am going to focus on the humble piece here. My father has hammered this theme into me since very early on. I heard stories after stories from his career working in the granite quarries every night over dinner. Early in my life, his stories were all about management related topics and big deals that he was contributing towards. He had a lot of people that reported into him, and he had a lot of responsibilities as a leader of much of the lifeblood industry in my hometown.
Then he exited the industry entirely for a few years building his own business, and then doing a substantial run in construction as a key employee in that firm. Well, by the mid 80’s the itch to get back into the granite industry needed to be scratched. So he went back in, but not into management. Instead, he went in as one of the guys working on the end of a shovel, drill, torch, and eventually a cutting edge drill that was on top of the quarry instead of down ‘in the hole’ as he says.
So what’s the point here?
Well, his stories were different when he was not in management as a ‘regular guy.’ His stories were just as varied as before, but the themes were sometimes painful to hear.
He now found himself working for guys that used to report into him.
He found himself sometimes treated fairly by guys that used to work for him.
He also found himself sometimes treated unfairly by guys that used to work for him. Let’s explore this a little bit.
The times when he was treated unfairly we discussed more than once. There were times when the lack of fairness was not intentionally directed at him – sometimes it was just how the circumstances played out. Business is business many times, and it is not personal – things just happen, and you have to react.
Then there were times when it was attributed to sheer ignorance of the overall context. He told the story of new bosses many times making suboptimal decisions because they just did not know any better. Even worse, they did not know that they were ignorant, and that if they had just asked for some input from their teams – things would have been better for everyone in terms of results – let alone teamwork.
Then there were times when it was personal.
For whatever reason, these men had it out for my father. Now I’m sure he’s not a perfect guy back in his late 70’s management career, and I have to believe the decisions he made back then were for the greater good for the business. The results from those days speak for themselves – business was exceptional even as the broader economy was wobbly. However, these guys had it out for my father, and he was invariably tested in ways that would have broken lesser men. Why they were so motivated to put him in less than ideal situations is something I do not understand to this day, and I do not think it is all that useful to figure out at this point.
What is most useful is how my father handled these misguided leaders. He knew that eventually they were doomed to failure, as they were not effectual leaders. He knew that they would be replaced, and he knew that he’d likely be offered more roles in management that he could opt into. In both scenarios – he was proven to be correct. He did not ever take another management role, yet he was an effectual leader helping those that enlisted him in his feedback.
On those darkest days when some guy at work would be overly focused on getting my father in a bad spot, my Dad would take that story as a learning opportunity for those of us around the table. Invariably it was always about being humble.
He promised me that I would be a leader of other men when I grew up, and that he could see it in me even in those early days. I had no idea what the hell he was talking about, and it seemed especially scary when he would speak to me so confidently about my prospects. Daunting is a great way to summarize the vibe when he’d look at me with those intense blue eyes and say this:
‘Remember to always be humble. And to always be hungry. Someday you could find yourself working for the guys that you are leading. If you remain humble, you will have nothing to worry about if the tables get turned.’
There are a lot of absolutes there in that quote, and many times – even today – he speaks in absolute terms. The key takeaway is that I have done my absolute best in terms of remaining humble at work and outside of work – even on my most prideful of days. I know for a fact that I have not always been the most humble guy in the room, however in my more recent years – this is something I have truly attempted to cultivate.
Turns out he was absolutely right – I have had a number of scenarios where the humility with those around me has literally saved my life. I’ll spare the the details, just know that my father was right.
There are some serious benefits to being humble that have been backed by a few studies that are worth sharing here:
Humble leaders are more effective.
Bradley Owens is the author of a study published in the Academy of Management Journal, he explains (Owens et al., 2011):
“Leaders of all ranks view admitting mistakes, spotlighting follower strengths and modeling teachability as being at the core of humble leadership.
And they view these three behaviors as being powerful predictors of their own as well as the organization’s growth.”
Better work performance.
I found this study that states both happiness and humility are predictors of job performance.
Better relationships
Humble people may have better relationships because they accept other people as they are, rather than who they wish them to be.
A study by Davis et al. (2012) of groups of people found that humility helped to build stronger bonds between people. This also increases your level of connectedness to others which has also been tied to greater happiness levels.
So aside from the obvious benefits that you carry knowing you are treating people the right way which is huge – you will have better relationships, better performance at work, and you will be an even better leader. Those last three are all backed by studies, and I know that there are even more benefits that you can expect to arrive as well.
Give it a shot.